No.1 Habit for a Successful Relationship (I Wish I Had Learned Before)

I will never forget the day when an old, black Mercedes- Benz parked in my parking lot, and this handsome dark-haired man greeted me with the most charming smile. This moment was a beginning of a fairytale story. A tale that you can experience only once in a lifetime. Because it breaks you into pieces, you need to rebuild yourself and find a different way to love. Our love story took us on a wild journey of all shades of love, but when the darkness came, it left us standing in the scenery of a bloody massacre. Unfortunately, love remains snow white only for a short time if you don’t know the secret ingredient to a lasting relationship.

Courtesy is the Key to a Happy Relationship

I have always admired my good friend’s parents because they seemed to have a special relationship. There was no nagging, no pointing out things the other one did wrong, no past. There was only kindness and over floating warmth between these two persons. This understanding and supportive relationship were scarce to see with other people, and back then, I always wondered reasons for their happiness together.

One day, I was listening to motivational audio about happiness. When I heard this male voice saying that the secret to a successful relationship is showing courtesy to your partner, I experienced this enlightenment striking through my mind. It was like the last piece in a puzzle was finished, and I understood my journey in all its cruelty.

The definition of courtesy is “the showing of politeness in one’s attitude and behavior towards others.” It all begins with this kind attitude towards a person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life. In other relationships too, when a person shows genuine politeness, it is difficult not to like them. But, on the other hand, when there is no courtesy, love quickly fades away. Only an old habit and fear of not finding any better keeps those two persons together.

When I was with my spouse, when conflicts emerged, we did not know how to respect and be polite. However, everything started to change when we began to rebuild our relationship as best friends and business partners. Now I understand why. Because there were no more two egos battling against each other, no bitter-sweet past and unforgiveness, we had started to be able to show kindness, respect, and genuine love.

You Need to Love Yourself First

Before you see the beauty of yourself, you cannot see the beauty in others. If your life is full of envy, bitterness, and other negative emotions, and you feel like life is treating you unequally, that’s what you attract. When you stop measuring things you do and giving becomes your passion, you’re on the right track to finding true happiness.

Treating your partner well makes them want to do everything for you. Only letting go of negativity and the need to be always right can open the door to a new kind of relationship and improve the current status of your life in so many ways. Focusing on what is good with your partner, you attract good energy between you.

Now that my heart is full of love for my previous spouse, I can also share my passion for other people and contribute good to this world. This new mentality opened a new way to feel gratitude and contentment. There is nothing I wouldn’t do to him, and despite not being together traditionally, we both know that there is only one person we can truly trust. You can create something exceptional when you let go of old.

True Love is Freedom

People are animals. We have strong instincts. Did you know that when a Great White Shark was captivated in an aquarium, it died within three days? We gradually wither away when we feel like tainted beasts trapped in a cage. The only thing that differentiates us from other animals is the ability to think. That’s what you should do more, and be conscious about the direction where you want to take your life and relationships.

I always believed that my spouse would be happier with someone else. But, now that I have learned that you become what you think about, I understand that I was directing my boat towards this end. Because I always knew in my heart that we had destroyed the possibility of lasting love, I headed us for a lethal crash. But, I know now that the purpose of our broken fairytale was to grow us to become the persons we are today.

We can set our own rules and a way to live our lives. We don’t need to follow old standards and habits that don’t seem to lead to happiness. You can always find a way to change when there is a will to do it. Find what is best for you. No matter where you go, what you do, and who you meet, always show courtesy to the people you love the most.

With love,
Jenna

Founder of Thejennablog, Author of ‘The Scammer’s Trap’

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